Overtime, a little ritual had evolved between Akshara and
me. We found a cozy corner in the kitchen where we would snuggle up for a few
minutes before beginning the rigors of the day. It involved the following steps:
I will sit on the floor with knees bent. She will come running, climb on the
knees, find her way to the lap, hug me and give a very warm smile. The whole
thing was so natural and matter-of-fact that it had not even registered.
I happened to be away for a few days and hence the ritual
had lapsed. I came back late in the night when Akshara had already slept. The
next morning, I was sipping coffee when Akshara walked in, all sleepy eyed. She saw me, gave a smile of recognition and
without a word held her hand out in a very purposeful manner. I set the coffee
aside and grasped those little fingers. She quietly led me to our corner. I was pleasantly surprised as remembrance of
our ritual dawned on me.
So, I sat down and bent the knees in the usual posture, this
time consciously and with anticipation. It was only after seeing me sit that
she relaxed and allowed a faint smile to adorn those lips. She had missed our
ritual and was obviously waiting for it for the last days. So, she must be full
of excitement. I fully expected her to come running and jump right in.
I was not prepared for what happened next. Is this how
personalities evolve, or are you born with it? Here was an event that is
evidently much looked for, you have missed it for a while, and here it is
again. What do you do? She had wordlessly reminded me of our ritual, she had
got me into the regular pattern, and now it was her turn. But she did not jump
in. She did not even smile. What was going on here? She quietly turned around,
her back to me, took the few small steps backwards and sat on my ankles.
Slowly, so very slowly, she rested her head on my knees. There was no giggle,
no smile, no words, no sound, no nothing. It was just us, and that moment. It
lasted for several seconds, it lasted for several centuries.
When she decided it was enough, she got up as wordlessly as
she had sat down, and started walking away, leaving me flummoxed. I was staring
at her back dumbstruck when she turned and gave a its-between-us smile. Then
she called out for her mummy.
